I, Me & Myself

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Abu Dhabi, United Arab Emirates
If you know me, you know about me and if you don't... well then read my blogs and you will find out

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

GREAT AD'S

WHAT AN IDEA, SIRJI
Dear All,
I have been crazy busy with work these past few days and before i get to reviewing Karthik Calling Karthik tomorrow let me leave you loyal visitors of my blog with some examples of great ad's.
Ciao
Vishal Calling Vishal
P.S. This compilation of ad's is courtesy my friend Saloni Arora. She's expecting royalty from this so if any large pursed beneficiaries out there then please do contact her with your contributions.... lolz
So Simple and yet So Effective. What would we do without parents.

And Yes, even 1 drink counts. Yes Yes even Beer.

And how many times have we given in to those 2 minute hunger pangs..


Ha Ha Ha....Brilliant.



So True. So True.

Again very Effective.


If Not Us, Who? If Not Now, When?




I am going to guess that the Pakis arent too happy about this. he he



Simbly. That's Why. SIMBLY



We Were Warned.

To All My Smoker Friends (Sallu included)




If the Environment angle doesnt convince you, how about some subtle religious blackmail?






Monday, February 15, 2010

My Name Is Khan - Movie Review

MY NAME IS THACKREY AND I AM A TERRORIST

Movie Review
MY NAME IS KHAN
* Shah Rukh Khan & Kajol
Music - Shanker Eshaan Loy
Directed by Karan Johar





Before I start the review, I have my own theory about the whole Shiv Sena – SRK drama.



I am sure some one must have shown a leaked copy of the movie to Bal Thackeray and his cubs.

My Name Is Khan makes a simple point, there are only 2 kinds of people in this world:
Good People and Bad People. Simple! Period! End of story.


Going by that principle, there are no Pakistanis to hate, no Biharis to harass and no Muslims to cast doubts upon.

Just Good & Bad People.

You do Good, you’re Good. You do Bad, you’re Bad.

So by that parameter the Shiv Sena falls somewhere between Bad and Absolutely Horrid.

And if I were crazy and perpetually paranoid like Bal Thackeray, I too would be afraid of the kind of message this movie is sending.

Very, Very Afraid.

So I don’t buy the whole Pakistan-IPL reason for the Sena’s ire.
It is something much bigger. It is about the common man seeing past their tirade and actually seeing them for what they really are. Very Bad People.

Now coming to the movie.

It isn’t a classic. Lets get that out of the way.

But more importantly it could not have been. Or else we would not be lining up to go watch it. It’d be another of those dreadfully boring documentary type movies that goes straight to video. So to make people go watch it, it could not possibly have been less than it is. So lets not expect it to be something it wasn’t trying to be.

What it was trying to be is a splendid masala movie with a message but without being boring.

And now better to do that than to get SRK and Kajol together again.

This is purely their movie. And boy, do they deliver the goods.

Kajol’s role in particular isn’t very well fleshed out but she brings such effortless charm to it that you can’t help but fall in love with her. And when she is finally given a scene to sink her teeth into......well.... she bites like a great white shark.


In the stunningly heartbreaking scene she lets her acting rip and by the end of those 4 minutes she manages to tear your heart apart with the sheer pain of her grief. I’ve seldom seen such raw pain at the movies. Compare that with the scene in Sarkar II where Aishwarya breaks down after Abhishek's death and you'll know the difference between 'acting' and 'performing'.
Simply Stunning.

And Shah Rukh Khan… a few years ago SRK was doing the showy formulaic movies with Aamir left to do the histrionic heavy lifting and yet this year its a role reversal where we’ve had Aamir with the corny 3 Idiots while SRK gives his 4th best performance (after Chak De, Swades & Kabhi Haan Kabhi Naa).

Without letting it slip even once into a caricature, SRK does the whole movie with that rare display of naïve guilelessness. And the best part is that as Rizvan Khan, the mask does not slip even once. I’m sure you must have heard of many adjectives used to describe him but I’m betting that before this movie ‘cute’ wasn’t one of them.

Quite incapable of telling a lie and manipulating words, he keeps asking Kajol to marry him and finally on a cold foggy morning, overlooking the beautiful San Francisco skyline (shot like a dream by K Ravi Chandran) when Kajol finally asks him to marry her, watch him squirm, blush and giggle like a school boy.

He shines even in simple scenes like when he first lands in San Francisco all he can do is gape open mouthed at the huge city from the taxi window.

Apart from the lead pair, Zarina Wahab (as Ammi) and Tanay Cheda (as the young Rizvan) have also performed admirably. The legendry Noor Jehan’s grand daughter Sonia Jehan (last seen in ‘Taj Mahal’) also brings a quiet dignity to her role as Rizvan’s sister in law while the boy playing Kajol’s son is thankfully allowed to be a normal teenager. Neither too cute nor too precocious.


I watched this movie at the Dubai Mall multiplex, surrounded by a mostly Muslim audience and apart from the usual laughs and a few claps the sound most audible was the approving “hmmm”.


It was almost like Rizvan Khan (and the Movie) was saying exactly what they felt.
“I AM A MUSLIM AND I AM NOT A TERRORIST”.

When Zarina as Ammi, explains to young Rizvan, the difference between Good and Bad people she shows him 2 simple figures. One is holding a stick and the other a lollipop.



“Can you tell me which one of them is a Muslim and which a Hindu?” she asks before explaining that “there are only 2 kinds of people in the world. Good & Bad. And its what you do that makes you Good or Bad. Not your religion”.

“Always remember that” she tells him, and if we too can remember that for ourselves, then we will automatically know who are the Good ones who we should support and who are the Bad ones who we should shun.

So if I were one of those shiv-sainiks with a brick in my hand, ready to hurl at the cinema door, I would be afraid of this movie. Very very afraid.

And that is it’s greatest asset.

Go watch it.

Luv

Vish

Thursday, February 04, 2010

Examples of WIT


FEELING SMART HUH?


POINTED REPLIES WHEN YOU COULD HAVE HEARD A PIN DROP.
Note: This post is courtesy my friend Dominic (formerly of B'lore but now nesting in Bombay {Take that you Thackreys})

Field Marshal Sam Bahadur Maneckshaw once started addressing a public meeting in English at Ahmedabad .
The crowd started heckling him,"Speak in Gujarati. We will hear only in Gujarati."

Field Marshal Maneckshaw replied,

"Friends, I have fought many a battle in my long career . I have learned Punjabi from officers of the Sikh Regiment; Marathi from the officers of the Maratha Regiment; Tamil from the officers of the Madras Sappers; Bengali from the officers of the Bengal Sappers , Hindi from the officers of the Bihar Regiment; and even Nepali from the very brave officers of the Gurkha Regiment. Unfortunately there was no Army officer from Guajart from whom I could have learned Gujarati."

...and there was pin drop silence.

Today at a time when the US President and other US politicians tend to apologize for their country's prior actions, here's a refresher on how some former US personnel handled negative comments about the United States.


JFK'S Secretary of State, Dean Rusk, was in France in the early 60's when Charles DeGaule, the French President, decided to pull out of NATO.

DeGaule said he wanted all US military out of France as soon as possible.

Rusk responded "does that include those who are buried here?"

DeGaule did not respond.

You could have heard a pin drop.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When in England, at a fairly large conference, Colin Powell was asked quite pointedly by the Archbishop of Canterbury if US plans for Iraq were just an example of empire building by George Bush.

He answered by saying;

'Over the years, the United States has sent many of its fine young men and women into great peril to fight for freedom beyond our borders. The only amount of land we have ever asked for in return is enough to bury those that did not return.'

And i bet you could have heard a pin drop. Archbishops should stick to theology.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

There was a conference in France where a number of international engineers were taking part, including French and American.

During a break, one of the French engineers came back into the room saying

'Have you heard the latest dumb stunt Bush has done?He has sent an aircraft carrier to Indonesia to help the tsunami victims. What does he intended to do, bomb them?'

A Boeing engineer stood up and replied quietly: 'Our carriers have three hospitals on board that can treat several hundred people; they are nuclear powered and can supply emergency electrical power to shore facilities; they have three cafeterias with the capacity to feed 3,000 people three meals a day, they can produce several thousand gallons of fresh water from sea water each day, and they carry half a dozen helicopters for use in transporting victims and injured to and from their flight deck. We have eleven such ships; how many does France have?"

Once again you could have possibly heard a pin drop but then with the French its not difficult to shut them up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A U.S. Navy Admiral was attending a naval conference that included Admirals from the U.S. , English, Canadian, Australian and French Navies.

At a cocktail reception, he found himself standing with a large group of Officers that included personnel from most of those countries. Everyone was chatting away in English as they sipped their drinks when a French admiral suddenly complained that, whereas Europeans learn many languages, Americans learn only English.

He then asked, 'Why is it that we always have to speak English in these conferences rather than speaking French?'

Without hesitating, the American Admiral replied, 'Maybe it's because the Brit's, Canadians, Aussie's and Americans arranged it so you wouldn't have to speak German.'

Anyone drop a Pin ?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

AND THE FOLLOWING STORY FITS RIGHT IN WITH THE ABOVE

Robert Whiting, an elderly US gentleman of 83, arrived in Paris by plane.

At French Customs, he took a few minutes to locate his passport in his carry on bag.

"You have been to France before, monsieur?" the customs officer asked sarcastically.

Mr. Whiting admitted that he had been to France previously.

"Then you should know enough to have your passport ready," the official snapped.

The American said, 'The last time I was here, I didn't have to show it."

"Impossible. Americans always have to show your passports on arrival in France !"

The American senior gave the Frenchman a long hard look and then he quietly explained,

''Well, when I came ashore at Omaha Beach on D-Day in 1944 to help liberate this country,
I couldn't find a single Frenchman to show a passport to."



--------------------------------

Have a nice weekend.

Luv as Usual

Vish

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Oscar Predictions



ITS THAT TIME OF THE YEAR AGAIN






The Oscar nominations are out and here are a list of major nominees with my own two bits about the movies I have watched. I’ve obviously not watched them all so this is a very subjective post. And since no nominations are ever fun without some predictions here are some of my own too.

Best Picture
(This year the Academy extended this list from 5 to 10 nominees but strangely the Best Director list is still just 5. The other 5 movies probably directed themselves)

Avatar
The Blind Side
District 9
An Education
The Hurt Locker
Inglourious Basterds
Precious
A Serious Man
Up
UP in the Air




‘Avatar’ now officially being the highest grossing movie in the world and path breaking in its technology looks like the obvious winner but in The Hurt Locker it has a movie that is one of the finest dramatic movies of the year. It is about the gulf war but at the same time its more than that. Much more than that. But if sheer quality were to be rewarded it’d have to be UP but it’ll probably get its award in the animation category.

Who should win: The Hurt Locker
Who will win: Avatar


Best Director

James Cameron, 'Avatar'
Kathryn Bigelow, 'The Hurt Locker'
Quentin Tarantino, 'Inglourious Basterds'
Lee Daniels, 'Precious'
Jason Reitman, 'Up in the Air’



For Tarantino, Daniels & Reitman the nomination is the award.
This is a straight fight between Bigelow and Cameron.
If he’s the self declared “King of the World” then she too is the “Ex-Queen of his World” (she’s his ex wife). He may have gotten the Golden Globe but more importantly she won the Director’s Guild (which has hardly ever predicted a wrong Oscar winner coz most of the Oscar voters are the same). So…

Who Should Win: Kathryn Bigelow
Who Will Win: Kathryn Bigelow


This way husband and ex-wife can share the awards and Oscar will be happy too.


Best Actor

Jeff Bridges, 'Crazy Heart'
George Clooney, 'Up in the Air'
Colin Firth, 'A Single Man'
Morgan Freeman, 'Invictus'
Jeremy Renner, 'The Hurt Locker'



Jeff Bridges is Hollywood royalty. Not the flashy A-List type but the silent beloved type. A great actor, he’s never won before and as Oscar is wont to do, this may end up being the consolation Oscar for all his previous work. Not that this is any less a performance.

Jeremy Renner (if you’ve watched The Hurt Locker) is so naturally good that it is not a performance at all. Pitch perfect is the only way to describe it.

As is Clooney’s performance but he’s done this so often and all so well that he’ll have to probably play a very, very nasty character before he can be given an Oscar.
Not to completely rule out Morgan Freeman.
He’s a Hollywood thespian, he’s playing a living legend (Mandela) in Invictus and for crying out loud, in the past he’s even played God. Twice.


Who Should Win: Jeremy Renner
Who Will Win: Jeff Bridges (unless God votes for Freeman)



Best Actress

Sandra Bullock, 'Blind Side'

Helen Mirren, 'The Last Station'

Carey Mulligan, 'An Education'

Gabourey Sidibe, 'Precious'

Meryl Streep, ‘Julia and Julia”



Streep’s won it many times before. Mirren just won recently for the Queen and frankly how can you possibly top The Queen. Mulligan & Sidibe are new. Once again the nomination is the award for them. However Hollywood sweetheart Sandra Bullock did a 180 degree turn to play this character in The Blind Side and there is no way anyone’s stopping her this year.

Who Should Win: Sandra Bullock.
Who Will Win: Sandra Bullock.




Best Supporting Actor


Matt Damon, 'Invictus'

Woody Harrelson, 'The Messenger'

Christopher Plummer, 'The Last Station'

Stanley Tucci, 'The Lovely Bones'

Christoph Waltz, 'Inglourious Basterds'



Damon like his buddy Clooney is again very likeable in Invictus but nothing he hasn’t done before. Plummer is again a beloved Hollywood elder and infact I cant believe he’s still alive. In these Avatar and 3D times he seems practically B&W. But starting with the Best Actor at Cannes there really will be major upset if Waltz doesn’t win. His Colonel Hans Landa was like watching someone being killed in slow motion by drowning in chocolate. Smooth and yet terrifyingly creepy.

Who Should Win: Christoph Waltz
Who Will Win: Christoph Waltz


Best Supporting Actress

Penelope Cruz, 'Nine'
Vera Farmiga, 'Up in the Air'
Maggie Gyllenhaal, 'Crazy Heart'
Anna Kendrick, 'Up'
Mo'nique, 'Precious'




I watched Precious at the Abu Dhabi Intl Film Festival last September and quite a few people (remember this is a strictly censored country) walked out of the hall when Precious was being screened without cuts. Monique lets loose quite a few times during the movie and everytime it’s a torrent of physical and verbal abuse of the kind that will turn your ears blue. You may have heard of a power house performance but this one is like a hurricane. I doubt anyone else even stands a chance. The only way Monique is going to lose this is if she continues to behave like a loose cannon on talk shows etc. As talented as she is and as good as the performance was, the bitch has no humble bone is her big fat body.


Who Should Win: Monique
Who Will Win: Monique


Best Animated Feature Film

'Coraline'

'Fantastic Mr. Fox'

'The Princess and the Frog'

The Secret of Kells'

'Up'



Seriously, who are we kidding. If you have to bet, this is the one to bet on. If UP doesn’t win it’ll be a fricking sensation. Its in the Best Picture shortlist for heavens sake.

P.S. What is this "Secret of Kells" ? I didnt even know there was a movie like that.



Best Original Screenplay
'The Hurt Locker'

'Inglourious Basterds'

'The Messenger'

'A Serious Man'

'Up'


I’d love to say any one of the other 4 but how more original can you get than Hitler and the entire Third Reich being shot, burnt alive and blown to bits in a cinema, by a French girl and her negro boyfriend assisted by some ‘glouriously’ accented Americans.




Let me know what your predictions are... Maybe we can even start a pool.



What Say??


Luv





Vish